01 December 2004
The day I nearly became a redneck
This post is already a little weird from the headline, but I was a little apprehensive when I walked into a barber yesterday to get a haircut. My view of the US and haircuts was not a good one. I don't know where I got that perception from, but it's been stuck in my mind for ages. The barber spoke very little English and I was trying to tell them step by step how to cut my hair, because it seemed the Spanish-speaking barber didn't understand "one-inch off the whole way round". Anyway, I finished with the ordeal and walked outside. I put my hand on the back of my neck and felt something weird... something I hadn't felt since the 80's. Something that I thought I'd put behind me a long time ago. I had a mullet. I looked at the reflection in the barber shop window and saw a redneck. I had an urge to smash my front teeth out and buy a check shirt and braces and call myself "Cletus". I fought the urge, raced back inside the barber shop and said "This won't do!" and got that mullet removed. Thank God for that.
Posted by Kristian Golding at Wednesday, December 01, 2004